Stung. In the Face.

My exercise plan is not going so well. I am quickly losing all motivation to leave the house to force myself to get outside and take my daily walk during my lunch.

Cedar requires no motivation. If I do not take him to walk now, he will sit outside my window and just stare at me the whole time I am trying to enjoy my lunch hour. If I walk outside, he will bark at me profusely until I fill so sorry for him that I trek back inside to get his leash.

Now that the plants are in full bloom, the beginning of my walk is pleasant enough. The smell of honeysuckles fill the air. I see wildflowers on the edge of the road. Sometimes, I even catch a glimpse of an animal or two.

Sound nice, right?

Well, it's not. I have decided that I do not really enjoy being in nature all that much. I would much rather enjoy it from inside my house looking out the window.

Why? Well nature around here is mean. That's right. Mean.

Nature fools you into thinking that you want to take part. You feel as though you should run right outside in the beautiful sunlight and smell the flowers blooming all around. In my hometown? It's a trap. Those beautiful flowers are hiding an army of mosquitoes ready to attack. Those beautiful trees? Hiding ticks.

I know I sound paranoid, but my attitude comes strictly from experience. I hate bugs.

A few weeks ago, wasps were a huge problem. So, we had the area around our house sprayed for "solitary" wasps and spiders. It has been the best thing that we have done since we moved in. Before that, I was afraid to leave my front door. As soon as the door would open, the wasps would head straight towards my head.

The latest problem has been gnats. They gather in groups of 9,786 and fly directly underneath my glasses. Quite an annoyance. It has become a pain to go outside.

But, I did it anyway because I knew I should. I put Cedar on the leash and off we went.

We were to the point in the road where I turn around and walk back home, when WHAP.

Something slammed into my cheek. Right on the bone.

I thought that it was probably just a bug that flew into me. Bugs will do that. You know, because it is fun for them. I can be the tallest thing in a 10 foot radius, and they will still fly right into me.

I started to continue walking when I felt that my cheek was starting to swell.

I decided that I probably required first aid. I got out my phone and texted my husband. I immediately heard him start up the four-wheeler and barrel down the hill to get me, sweep me off my feet and chariot me away from all the nature back into the safe fortress that is my house. My hero.