Don't Mess With My Soap

After a long, hard day at the office, then coming home and finishing up a list of household chores, I finally sat down with my dogs to relax and enjoy my escape to Soap Land.

Soaps are ridiculus and totally, completely fake. I know. My husband loves to remind me of this anytime that he'd rather watch the absolutely 100% real drama of "Ice Road Truckers" or some other show like that. But, as usual, I digress.

Back to my Soaps.

I DVR "One Life to Live" & "General Hospital" every day. I don't have time to watch them every day, so tonight - getting to see the shows on the date they aired - was a rare blessing.

I hit the "Play" ready to leave my troubles behind for the completely fake world in Llanview, when to my horror - the newscaster came on. They would be bringing me "live" to the funeral service of my state's most infamous politician.

I'll pause again here to acknowledge that with the above statement and perhaps with statements to follow, I just provided a pretty big clue to break my semi-anonymousness. I'm trusting you, Internet, to refrain from exploiting this little tidbit of information to reveal my location and connect to my friends & family which I try to protect from my random commentary.

I tried to remain calm and take advantage of the FF button. I FF'd on and on and on. I saw a line of speakers standing in front of a large group of people in choir robes and periodic flashes of the audience. Not even a commercial. Then, much to my dismay the "Would you like to delete this show?" message appeared. Oh, no.

I moved on to "General Hospital". SAME THING.

There would be no soaps today.

Thank goodness for SOAPNet.